Money and the way it comes and goes ,how important or what is its limit ...these thoughts and worries never occurred to me when I was with my parents
We were given everything we desired for ..(Acha used to get us everything we asked for ...from pen ,books ,dresses ...to whatever it may be ...and amma used to scold him saying "Kids should know the value of money ,then only they will respect and value it " )
And for that Acha used to say "I had been denied of many things in my childhood ...some because my father couldn't afford and some because being the elder one , I had to give up many of my dreams ,,wishes and ambitions for the betterment of the younger ones . i don't want my kids to go through all that ,and I will try my level best so that they get everything and anything they wish for !!!
After marriage when I went with him to a new place , I was too young ,ignorant an immature ...slowly I was getting new awakenings of life ...new place ,new people and was getting to know some bitter truths of life !!
He never shared with me the difficulties he was facing,but I understood slowly that it was all not good that was happening ...I new that our budget was poor and with the arrival of a new one in the family things were becoming more delicate .Sometimes I found him trying hard to make both ends meet ...even without the slightest of luxury ...meeting the daily expenses were a herculean task for us
That is when I realized the value of money and I regretted and repented the way i gave it no importance in life .And I remembered amma`s words .But then I dint want to blame acha too ,bcoz even when I was having a hear time with little money to spend , I had some beautiful memories to hold on and was happy that i had all my wishes granted once !! 
Acha Amma were very much disturbed to see me living like that ,I never complained or told them anything .They concluded things when they came to stay with us in between .Slowly and steadily as years passed by our situation became better.In the beginning i had a urge to buy a lot of things from show pieces to dresses ...as I was tuned like that from childhood. Every exhibition excited me ...visited every stall ..collected things whether i need it or not was not my issue ...and obviously I was one happy soul !!
And some things that happen in our life change the entire scenario,rt ? For me too out of the blue when someone dear to me just left without saying a word ...my thought and views about life and living changed . Such was the impact an then I realised there is nothing left in these things and somehow my craziness died ...
I was hapy with what i had ,and a visit to an exhibition ,buying new clothes or things never excite me anymore (which came as a shock to my mom who even at the age on 70 is still happy with shopping and buying things and she keep on worrying why I have changed to this ...bcoz I was the partner in crime for all her shopoholism`s )...but then I was at peace with what I have changed to and I was not worried.
I feel that I dont want to impress anyone with my clothing ,collection or the way I look or dress ...earlier I use to be proud when people appreciate me and my collections ...Now over the years it has no effect on me . I neither get hurt or happy or angry by anyone`s comments ...bcoz what I am is strictly my choice , my way of doing things and I am happy about it ...and happiness and inner peace is all that matters in the end for all .
My outlook towards life changed ,and when looking back the things I thought was giving me happiness all looked so dull ,meaningless and useless to me .May be at that point of time that was my way of happiness ...well our ways of getting happiness changes as old progresses I guess .Life altogether looked different and that is when this question of money started haunting me !!!
Actually ,how much money does a person need...I would say it depends on his desires and his determination of fulfilling his dreams. And my thought is one of the biggest fear and threat for an individual is the expenses one has meet at his old age ...for we cannot predict for medication and hospitalization ...it can be hundreds ,lakhs or even crores ...Yes you need to save for that ...so that you can die peacefully without being a burden for your kids ..well that is what I think
So why do I need money? How much ? What are its purposes ?To make a better living for my kids is it ?And they will work day and night for a better living for their kids and the cycle continues ,huh ?So when does one live for oneself ? Or is there no such option in our society ? in our life ?
Why do people run after money these day ?Why are they always unsatisfied with whatever they have? Is it because money has become a status symbol these days? Or is it the insecurity about the future that leads to this craving for money ? Or are we trying to prove ourselves and others that we are worth something ? Or is the fear of illness ? Or the fear of being a burden to others ? Have you not seen it kill relationships 
And as for me ,thanks to my hubby`s organisation ,they take care of the entire medical expenses of he employee and the spouse even after the retirement till their death !! 
So that leave me of the greatest fear !!So now how much do I need ...i don't have any desire for clothing ,shopping or anything ...yes I do wish to see places ..well that too depends on my partners wishes as I am dependent ,so that leave me with peace of mind for I believe that ,if my desire and dreams are strong one day my wishes will be fulfilled , so why worry now for things that are not under my control.
And as for me ....I think the money you need or save has to be in propotion to your dreams plus your future expenses ...expected and unexpected ...whether it is for buying bungalows ,travelling or savng for the next generation (Btw..let the next gen too learn to earn and save by themselves and not to depend on their parents money )
So start your journey ,fulfill your dreams ,but don`t forget to live your life...life is too short and it doesn't always give you a second chance ..Happiness has to be the key and money just a way to conquer your dreams .Don`t get too attached or addicted to it ..for sadly I have seen it killing relationships and making one tooo selfish ...It is so hurtful indeed !!
BE HAPPY IN WHATEVER YOU DO
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